Hmmpff!

Recently, I ran in to a "good" friend at a funeral who wouldn't even acknowledge me. Couldn't even look me in the eyes.

What's his problem?

At first I thought he was just upset because it was a sombre event, but then I started thinking maybe he wasn't speaking to me because of the $3500 I owed him and never paid back. Did he finally discover I had slept with his wife? Maybe someone told him I slept with his sister too? And his Mother? Maybe that's why he's so cold to me. 

Maybe he found out about all those times I scratched curse words into his car door with my key. Or that time I shaved his cat but just left a mustache. Maybe he found out it was me.

After about an hour of this uncalled-for behavior, I couldn't take it anymore. I went up to him and asked him straight to his face "do you have a problem with me?"

But he didn't answer. 

He just lied there, with his arms folded across his chest and eyes closed like he didn't hear a word I said. All smug in his nice oak box with brushed nickel handles. 

Bastard.